Last Of The Summer Whine

It's official. The wettest summer since 1956. Experts say "floods could return". Heck, anyone could have figured that out. How about a government grant to figure out if other naturally occurring weather patterns could return. Dibs on snow.

Keith Groves, head of forecaster in the Met Office, stated that "this summer has been very wet and very disappointing for most." What he actually means is everyone but because he's a weather forecaster, he can't say anything with certainty. I bet you can't find one person who thought the weather was fantastic.

Anger at the Government for not reacting fast enough, Gordon Brown stated that they were "funding a resilient nationwide network of control centres automatically backing each other up in times of need such as high volumes of calls."

You see, people don't want flood protection. They just want to moan to a switchboard operator when their household goods are floating in their back garden.