Chris & Eva's Wedding: Part III

I was up earlier than normal for a quick breakfast and groom duties and first on the agenda was picking up button holes from Maggie's and taking them along with my suit to the Grove for a costume change.

It was a muggy morning and even warmer inside and after wiping sweat from my brow, slipped into the wedding gear and adorned myself with bling in the form of pocket watch and diamond cuff-links.

After a few quick photographs outside, Philip and I drove to his hotel and made our way down with Chris to the cathedral. He seemed more nervous yesterday than now so we took that to be a good thing. There was quite a crowd outside and we made our way into the cool confines of pews and statues awaiting for the time to take up our positions.

It was great to have such a view from a best mans perspective and it was an honour for me to be standing there and witness their marriage from up close. On the previous day when we ran through a mock version with the Dean, there were cracks of smiles seconds away from fits of giggles but today there were only beaming smiles and loving glances.

The ceremony went very well and I was glad I was right at the front because my singing is, as you all may know, appalling. There were two hymns and the first was sang to the theme of Unclef**ker in South Park, the second I cannot recall.

After leading the bridesmaids around to the private section of the cathedral and witnessing the signing, we returned to the main section and walked down the aisle and out the front into what seemed like paparazzi as tourists began snapping away. No doubt I will end up in many random strangers holiday snaps.

After Chris and Eva drove away in their 1920's automobile we followed in a coach to the marquee in a field around 10 miles away. Once inside, I drank many Pimms and Bucks Fizz to calm my nerves as we approached the time for speeches.

Luckily we had dinner first and it was the finest spread I've seen yet at any wedding I've been to. Huge hams and turkeys alongside other buffet food which I would have had seconds of but I was saving myself for the pig and cow spit later in the evening.

I never usually get nervous but my left left was bouncing up and down a little and my table said I had become very quiet. I had that horrible feeling in my stomach and I was a little twitchy which came and went as first Mike and then Chris spoke.

Mike is a lifelong friend of Maggie's and has led an interesting life as he went hitchhiking in his teens some years ago to Afghanistan and I'm sure has a lot of brilliant stories in between. It's a pity I only had a brief time to talk to him but it was his field we held the party in and he's a cool guy to know.

When Chris finished his speech, I stood up and thanked everybody for coming and then launched into mine with assistance from the cards. Once I started talking and getting a few laughs I began to relax a little and my last joke received a huge round of applause which I was stunned and delighted at. It went down well and I was still shaking for a few minutes afterwards but now it was out of the way I sat down and enjoyed Andy's speech and the rest of the night.

Tables were cleared and the Ceili band set up in the corner whilst we attempted to play a game of Frisbee outside but it was far too windy and we retreated back inside to the warmth of the marquee.

Having ceilied before I was looking forward to it rather than bricking it and expecting my usual keenness to be replaced by inept movements and I didn't let my fans down as in once relatively complex dance I ran across the dance floor and hooked up with the wrong women. Still, it's great fun and every wedding should have it.

Ceili led the way to pig spit and pig spit led the way to DJ and dance floor mayhem and we danced the night away until the small hours.

It was a fantastic day and everyone had a great time.