Suit You Sir!

As part of wedding preparations for friends Chris and Eva, and as the best man, I had to have myself measured for a suit. The first thought I had was that I don't know anywhere to get this done within walking range of work. The second was a recollection of a Friends episode when Joey recommended a tailer to Ross and inappropriate cupping was involved.

I wonder if straight tailors are annoyed and disimayed at their profession continually undermined as a homsexual profession in film and media i.e. The Fast Show, The Italian Job etc. Personally, I care not of the persuasion of any worker, only that they are competent in their job. And no funny stuff goes on - but that goes without saying. Imagine hiring a clown who ends up reading Sartre to your children.

But I digress. I finally revisited the place where my parents bought me two suits after graduation in 2001. One was a light green suit for graduation which still looks surprisingly wearable considering it's a light green suit. The other was a grey suit for interviews of which it has been worn for 4 successful times. Good old dependable grey. It never goes out of fashion. If you were to meet a race of aliens, you'd wear a grey suit for neutrality incase colour offended them and you'd have trade routes set up within a lunar cycle.

After explaining to the tailor what I needed, he was happy to oblige and set about wrapping my waist and chest in measuring tape. The outer leg followed and finally my head needed attention. According to guidelines for hats, I should be measured 1 inch above the ears. He said he had never measured a head before (insert insidious remark referencing second paragraph here). *sigh*

So now I have all the measurements except for some reason I have to give my weight. This is tricky because I do not, never have or ever will own a pair of scales. Thus I will have to weigh myself when I'm next at my folks place and especially before Mum serves dinner and I'm offered a fifth helping of spuds and three kinds of dessert.
At least when this is finally done I'll know my weight and waist size, go on a mad slimming diet and not fit into my suit. It'll make for a great speech when my trousers fall down half way through.