Summer Holiday

Rising early, stress, and the working week can take a partial summer vacation. Adventures in Sigh-Fi is applying some #45 sunblock and putting up a sign saying "gone fishin' for inner zen"

See you on Monday 16 July for full update.

Gamespot #71

Bloxorz

Tumble a rectangular block through each stage and deposit it into the square hole at the end, using a series of bridge-opening switches, teleporters, and block-splitting switches.

Scentless Subterfuge

On Saturday evening we met up with Keith, Jenny and friends to celebrate his last day working in the western hemisphere. At least for someone else. We kicked things off with a few pints in the Empire which now has an excellent fully covered beer tent/gazebo in the front porch and the inside didn't smell like puke and bleach - which is always a bonus - like the last time we visited and swiftly left sans purchases. Publicans take note - you need something to cover the smell of stale sweat and bodily odours that tobacco smoke hid. Grenouille would have had a field day in there.

There was some indoor football playing in the background which has to be one of the most pointless sporting conversions at a legitimately televised level. Small pitch, no throw-ins, no room to show any real skills - although admittedly there was one rather good goal when a player chipped the ball over the keeper. Bring back Kabaddi I say.

A table had been booked in Benedict's and after sinking our second pint, we made our way there. I had not been back in years because I kept hearing very bad reports about it (and to my mind there are infinetly better bars in Belfast). Friends of friends have been maliciously assaulted and one colleague had mentioned broken glass being placed in handbags resulting in cut hands for no other apparent reason than to cause wanton hurt.

What I can confirm was that when we arrived the place was relatively quiet but the downstairs toilets were a total disgrace. They stank of urine and flies were buzzing about the urinals. Disgusting.

We made our way upstairs and were shown the way to our tables. I have to admit that the menu looked decent enough and the food wasn't bad at all, especially as it was the price at the time of ordering so if you're looking for somewhere to eat before 7.30pm, I would recommend it. Stay for the food, leave for the drinks.

We all had a great time anyway and after leaving, we visited the new Lavery's off-licence across the road which is fantastic compared to most others grog shops, selling a particular bottle of wine which Lou and I have been tracking down for months so we'll be back for a few bottles of that in the near future.

Take Two Placebo's And Call Me Lame

It would figure that the time I get a runny nose and sneezing fits, news abounds about the pseudo-medicinal drug echinacea. Hilariously I have now sneezed twice between these sentances and must now dash off to the toilet for some tissue. Needless to say it's that awful kind that you can practically see through before even using it.

Of course this new evidence outrightly contradicts previous studies of the plant extract which actually showed that "cold sufferers taking echinacea were actually ill for longer than those who took dummy pills."
Even the new study proves inconclusive but will no doubt trigger a consumer spending increase like so many headline hitting news stories. I would expect a significant increase in people walking into walls if they were told it helped reduce stress.

In an editorial in the same journal dismissing echinacea, Professor Ronald Turner of the University of Virginia, said "Any expectation of benefit is based on faith rather than science." And we all know about the factual basis of faith - it doesn't exist.

How Much Is Too Much?

Friday afternoon finally arrived and like a child let loose on summer vacation, I was glad to break free of the shackles of the working week once again and spend a few days putting the feet up and chilling out.

The weekend seemed to arrive a little earlier in the week however, as we were at the folks on Thursday evening enjoying the fine weather - I think it was the only evening that week that didn't rain - and using the newly erected Gazebo which more or less was built on the shell of the first only this time, it had walls. Of course what I mean is sides with faux windows so you can pretend to be outside, inside. I suppose they're meant for people who don't like being outside so it's a poor man's trick to con you into believing you're still enjoying the luxury of indoor life in an over sized tent.

Speaking of tents, the years big festival, Glastonbury, kicked off and it was bigger than ever (isn't is always?) with 177,000 people milling around trying to get within 200 feet of the pyramid stage. I'm not sure what it was like on the ground, but for most part the sound was awful and you could probably have put a cover band on stage and the punters would have lapped it up.

What gets me about the coverage is how they tell you about the magic of the festival which only reinforces the notion of how good it used to be before the soul was removed and the corporational attitude filled the void. That's not really true of course, I think it has to do with numbers more than anything else. Too many hippies spoil the party and you can't be intimate with 176,999 people standing around you.

The bands shown on TV were equally depressing mainly showcasing the Kaiser Chiefs, Kasabian and the Arctic Monkey's rather than the numerous small bands in the smaller tents that deserve to be noticed. It was enough for me to turn the TV on to something else, mainly a black screen, and pick up the Sunday Times for AA Gill's ego-boosting articles where he supposedly talks about a subject but actually two-thirds of the article is about him. He makes Jeremy Clarkson seem humble.

I hope you had a great weekend and catch you tomorrow for more of the same.

States of Mind

There was a programme on Wednesday night that I caught the end twenty minutes of called State of Minds. It was based on a recent survey by Orla Muldoon and Paul Connelly of Queen's University and commissioned by the BBC that was undertaken to measure prejudice in Northern Ireland. The show took the findings of the report and conducted its own style of testing and filmed the results.

The first test was The Bus Study whereby a group of two equally religiously split groups of students went on two very different bus tours, one focusing on the dark past and one on Belfast's bright future. It found that the students who went on the tour highlighting the troubles expressed more prejudice than those that went on a tour highlighting the new positive facets of Belfast.

The second test involved 'losing' 400 letters in Northern Ireland bearing stereotypically Protestant and Catholics names in residentially segregated areas to see if they would be delivered or thrown away. Overall, letters addressed to groups of religious denomination were less likely to be returned indicating people were more prejudiced towards institutions and organisations than individual people. Video evidence showed a letter being dropped within 10 feet of a postbox and a person picking it up and looking at the letter five or more times before depositing it and on one occasion, a man looked at the letter and walked back to his car, got in and drove off.

The third test that I did not see involved subconscious association of favourable ideas with one group and unfavourable ideas with the other group. The study found that overall Catholics tended to associate positive or favourable words with Irish/Catholic images and Protestants tended to associate positive or favourable words with Protestant/British images.

"[Overall,] the findings suggest that there are many components to prejudiced beliefs, such as beliefs that Catholics and Protestants are fundamentally different, felt emotions towards the other group and diversified religious difference into political, ethnic and national difference. There was a large degree of variability in the views expressed. However whilst there was a large degree of overlap in scores across all groups and the strength of the views expressed were related to demographic factors such as gender, age and social class. Women tended to express less prejudiced views than men on average and those from less affluent areas more prejudiced attitudes than those from more affluent areas."

However, What I thought was really disapointing following the results on the show was that the most prejudiced group after 60+ was the 18-24 age bracket. I would have assumed it would gradually decline in proportion to age but I was sadly mistaken. Perhaps this is due to the fact that no target range has lived within peace times and this is still majorly influencing the results. We will just have to wait another ten or twenty years before another study is undertaken and hope for the best.

Why not take the test yourself and post the result? Of course, the test itself assumes you are from one 'side' or the other and as an atheist, the results become skewed so it may say you're one thing when you're obviously not. For example, my result states:

You scored between 21 and 24. Your attitudes can therefore be described as “somewhat intolerant”. In comparison to the rest of Northern Ireland your attitudes are more negative than average. However you do not fall into that quarter of the population with the most negative attitudes.

Of course, as an atheist, I'm completely intolerant of any religion which makes me look intolerant on the test. I'd really like to see a more in-depth study that people are free to undertake to give a more enlightened view of Northern Ireland.

Next

Review by LMcG

Next is the latest Nicholas Cage action flick, which also features Julianne Moore, two leads that lend the production more credibility than it actually deserves. The plot centers on Las Vegas showroom magician Cris Johnson (Cage) who trades on his secret ability to see two minutes into the future by peddling cheap magic tricks. He does his best to lie low making small winnings off the gambling scene, but when a terrorist group threatens to detonate a nuclear device in Los Angeles, government agent Callie Ferris (Moore) must use all her wiles to capture Cris and convince him to help her stop the cataclysm.

Next is a very watchable action-thriller It features some new and interesting set pieces centred around the main character, but struggles with an obviously low budget when the major action sequences take place. The best sequences involve Cris moving in a very choreographed way to avoid gun shots and punches (much like Keanu Reeves in The Matrix, but without the slow-mo) simply by calculating at what precise time and what precise direction they will come at, having seen the shots happen two minutes beforehand.

The plot progresses reasonably well, introducing the obligatory love interest in quite an amusing way that is reminiscent of Bill Murray in Groundhog Day. Of course this hyper-speed new union plays a major part in the motivation of the central character and therefore lends some predictability to the climax. Attempts are made at clever or at least unexpected ending, but quite frankly this leaves the viewer with a feeling of great dissatisfaction and gets the teacher-style verdict - simply could do better. Overall, Next is not a bad film, its just best enjoyed over a few beers on a Saturday night.

3 Facts About Alcohol

At a party on Saturday we were served little chocolate sweets that contained alcohol which got me thinking about the subject of food and/in drink. Here's some interesting facts I found out:

1. A few years ago a study showed that drinking alcohol without eating raises the chance of developing high blood pressure and indeed drinking without food may counteract any benefit to the heart associated with moderate alcohol consumption.

2. The reason why you need the toilet so much after the first few drinks is due to alcohol inhibiting the release of a hormone called anti-diuresis. This hormone has the effect of reabsorbing water into the blood, so it isn't lost in the urine. Without it, it tends to mainly go through.

3. According to one source, it is perhaps the greatest culinary urban myth of our time that alcohol 'cooks out' in food as it is on the stove. Alcohol may have a lower boiling point (78.5C) than water but after preparation, alcohol ranging from 4%-85% is still there depending upon a number of factors such as cooking temperature, size of the cooking vessel, cooking time, and the presence of other ingredients in the prepared dish. This is therefore extremely important if for, example, the person eating such a dish is a recovering alcoholic or a Muslim.

Shooter

Mark Wahlberg has made some good choices in his career before Shooter, with his last four films being some of my favourite in recent years such as The Departed (except the last ten minutes), Four Brothers and the hilarious I Heart Huckabees. Unfortunately for us, he made the badly Americanised version of The Italian Job and will be following this up in 2009 with (I'm guessing) a horrible sequel of The Brazilian Job.

As far as this year is concerned, he's starred in two films and Shooter is hopefully the more forgettable of them.

Wahlberg is living in exile is after his commanding officers turn their back on his covert operation in Ethiopia and he loses faith in his career and Danny Glover tracks him down to coax him back into action after learning of a plot to kill the president.

However, the plot is no more than a highly sanctioned ordered double-crossing and Wahlberg finds himself framed for his duties and is forced to go on the run to find who set him up and why.

Also unfortunately for us, the film turns into something akin to a Michael Bay action thriller with more explosions than emptying an entire packet of snap, crackle and pop into your mouth although there are some sweet head shots from a sniper rifle and someone gets their arm blown off after being a cocky bad guy.

This, however, is not enough to save the film and I'm surprised it's got such a high score on IMDB. Save this one for a drunken lads night because you'll need the smokescreen of booze to cover this film being something of a dud.

I would give this film 5.4 double-crosses out of 10

Don't Rain On My Parade

Saturday mornings for me have long been defined by recooperating from the night before and settling in to the weekend. Part of this recovery process involves a long stretch on the sofa watching Saturday Kitchen, a cookery programme with two live guest chef's and old episodes of Rick Stein, Keith Floyd, Masterchef etc which lure me into the sense of false security that the afternoon shopping trip will be painless and worthwhile.

The fact that the people on TV have had to get up hours before I did makes me feel better and the process of watching chef's make mouth watering dishes gets me in the mood for lunch which in turn provides me the energy to go to the supermarket for groceries and enivitably crush the goodwill built up in the last few hours as my willpower is slowly sapped by some nimrod in aisle seven.

However, there was no Saturday Kitchen. Instead of watching delcious recipes that I want to make but will then have no inclination to follow through because I've been half sleeping and forgotten the ingredients, there was some marching band or what-not parading about the place and dulling up my morning. I figured it had something to do with the Falkland's and turned the TV off after failing to find my programme on another BBC channel. So I did the only decent thing and went back to bed.

After rising a second time and showering to wake up more than to get cleaned, we made our way to Connswater Shopping Centre, possibly the most soul-destroying place one can shop at on a weekend (or possibly any other day) but we had good reason. It was a friends birthday and we were buying him a Bop-It which could only be purchased in Argos which is to be found inside said Shopping Centre.

On reaching the outer perimeter of the complex, there was bumper to bumper traffic coming and going from all sides of the roundabout and immediately my heart sank - this would be a long shop. Again I wondered what was going on and chalked it down to a Falklands memorial or something. What else could it be?

Later on at the party, I was recalling my above dismay regarding the lack of my TV show and the gut-wrenching standstill and pain of shopping and was told, in humourous terms, that it was the Queen's birthday. To make matters worse, it wasn't even her real birthday. Cheeky cow :P

She was born on 21 April 1926 but has another birthday celebrated on the first, second, or third Saturday in June, and is marked in London by the ceremony of Trooping the Colour, which is also known as the Queen's Birthday Parade. So I can blame that for my lack of Saturday morning culinary delight. However, I'm sure she'd rather be watching Saturday Kitchen than watching a slow march around the palace.

Gamespot #70

Bomb It

Finally a cool looking and great playing version of the classic Bomberman.

Pitted against three opponents, you must bomb your way out of the corner and explode your enemy!

Links #40

Coming Out Insurance

It's a fact that 1 out of 10 babies in America will grow up to be gay.

Luckily, the good folks and Coming Out Insurance have come up with a plan to help you cope with the financial hardships of having that little gay boy or girl.

It's called the comprehensive coming out insurance policy, and it's VUNDERBAR!






Elantra Stunt Team

A team of stunt drivers perform amazing tricks, including changing a tire while the vehicle is moving and on two wheels, synchronized slaloming, and jumps.












South Park: Red Hot Catholic Love

The Catholic way of molesting little boys has pushed one South Park priest to vist the Vatican to change this, while South Park residents turn to Atheism.

Flood Gates Open

It looks like I got more than I bargained for yesterday in terms of a thunder storm. As the afternoon progressed and the booms faded away, the stories came in of mass flooding across Belfast.

The east of the city was particularly affected with Connswater Shopping Centre closed after flooding and even my Dad's building suffered as a roof partially collapsed and the floor was filled with water.

As I left for work and headed up the Ormeau Road, the traffic was almost at a standstill and I was zi-zagging all over the pavement attempting to avoid the massive puddles.

The Lagan river seemed largely unaffected in no small part due to the weir system doing its job although the water had changed from green to brown because of the sediment being moved around by the swell.

As I made my way through Ormeau Park the grass in most parts looked like lakes and my path was blocked by 4 inches of flooding water so I had no choice but to walk through it.

The final stretch along the Ravenhill Road was a complete disaster and even features as the first picture in the BBC's news article covering the story.


As you can see I could have used a canoe to get to my home and luckily as I rounded the corner the waters had abated and had I stayed in my house all day looking into the back garden, I wouldn't have noticed anything was amiss.

I suppose the warning here is that you should be careful what you wish for because you just might get more than you bargained.

Some Loud Thunder

According to the weather report, our run of dry hot heat is coming to and end and for once, I don't mind. In fact, it's almost a welcome relief. I don't think I could spend many more nights kicking off the duvet and enduring strange dreams that humid sleeping brings on. They say that cheese brings on such dreams but I've never found this to be true. In fact, according to a nutrition scientist at The Dairy Council, "one of the amino acids in cheese - tryptophan - has been shown to reduce stress and induce sleep so cheese may actually help you have a good night's sleep."

Actually it turns out that Tryptophan is found as a component of dietary protein and is particularly plentiful in such things as chocolate, bananas, milk, yogurt, cottage cheese, red meat, eggs, fish, poultry and peanuts. That's pretty much everything that could be in my daily diet so it's no wonder I sleep well!

Another favourite event of hot, humid weather turning is the resulting thunder storms. Although rare in this country, I love when it does occur. The rain pounds the earth and the distant echo of thunder is strangely comforting, as long as you are inside looking out. I imagine it's not so much fun being out there in it.

Asleep On A Sunbeam

With the weather hitting the mid-twenties all weekend, we have hardly stepped a foot inside and after stopping for a pint after work on Friday, the evening was spent lounging in the chairs before the sun went down and Lou and I watched the last few episodes of Prison Break. I know we're a year or so behind everyone on this but it's great to have a series on tap and watch back-to-back episodes. It was also early to bed (midnight) as I was up early next morning to catch a bus to Dundalk.

We hopped on the 11.30 bus to Dublin and grabbed a seat at the back hoping for some snooze time and extra leg room but unfortunately we were surrounded by a bunch of millies heading to the Beyonce concert and it was all mobile phone tunes, alco-pops, frighteningly bad grammar and conversations that would make an idiot seem intelligent. There was also a problem with the AC and the bus was sweltering so the entire trip was somewhat oppressive.

After hitting Dundalk and glad to get into the cooler air, we met Simon and Mary and dived straight into a bar for welcome cold pints and lunch. I ate a cheese and bacon burger the size of my fist and refreshed myself with a a couple of pints of Becks Viers - a highly recommended lager.

We then headed back to their house and had a great afternoon sitting in their back garden drinking beer and chatting with a house tour in the middle including Simon's room which has a fantastic collection of zippo lighters, old bottles and war memorabilia.

It was a great day and the sun was still warming the evening sky as we made our way back into Belfast and had a few people over for drinks. We were able to sit outside until the early hours of the morning and were surrounded by candles to shed light on our conversation. Sunday was to be another fine day and we didn't want to waste it so we arranged an impromptu BBQ.

It was the perfect Sunday afternoon spent idly chatting and reading the Sunday paper followed by flame grilled burgers and wine. All in all, a fantastic weekend.

More photos here!

Gamespot #69

Ant-Buster

A quick and easy but ultimately fun game. Erect towers to shoot at ants and stop them from stealing your delicious cake slice by slice!

Links #39

Sexual Harassment Training

A short training video on what you can and can not do at work.













Maplewood Drug Bust

A news reporter is at a drug bust when the police walk out with somting unusual.













Tortoise Defends Turf Against Cats

A tortoise defends its turf in someone's backyard from some stray cats.

The London 2012 Logo Fiasco

On the news this morning they were lambasting the new London 2012 Olympic Games promotional video advertising due to a sequence that has had to be removed because of health implications.

Apparently the old sequence could trigger epileptic seizures but it could also trigger a repsonse of believing you were in 1987.

According to the official site, "the emblem is modern and will be dynamic, evolving in the years between now and 2012."

London's Design Museum founder Stephen Bayley said the logo was "a puerile mess, an artistic flop and a commercial scandal."

I have to agree. I also have to point out, and I'm not the first, that the logo looks like two Picasso objects with one about to give fellatio to the other.

The logo, which has taken a year's work and £400,000 investment, seems incredulous. I would wager that given an afternoon, a class of primary school children could knock up something better.

21st Century Taboos

After signing out of my archaic hotmail account yesterday, MSN's front page had a feature called "21st Century Taboos".

"To dabble in them is to invite at the very least a raised eyebrow or pursed lip; at worst, complete social opprobrium."

In case you don't know what opprobrium means, it's disgrace arising from exceedingly shameful conduct. I was immediately keen to know what these are to see if I'd broken any and could feel that rush of taboo breaking.


1. Giving money to beggars

"Once there was no stigma attached to the practice of handing over loose change to somebody asking for money on the street. The equation was clear. They were down on the luck; you could do something about it."

Say what? Someone down on their luck, begging on the street could be fixed by a few strangers handing over a well-earned ten-pence piece?

"But when did giving someone ten pence for a cup of tea become an epic ethical conundrum?"

I guess when ten-pence inflated to fifty pence and a cup of tea became a bottle of White Lightning. I guess if we saw beggars outside greasy spoons requesting loose change instead of fifty yards from an off-licence we'd be more inclined to hand over some cash. So if breaking a taboo is giving money to a beggar then let's all smash open that piggy bank, take the streets and get our taboo fix on.


2. Speaking to a stranger on a bus or train

It makes it sound as if having a conversation on public transportation is going to get you on the local news and witnesses will be queing up to talk to Linda Ballantine:

"Well, there I was just minding my own business when this social upstart turns around to this older gentleman and says 'nasty weather we're having eh?' I thought I was going to curl up and die on the spot."

"Nowadays such actions are treated as the product of a disturbed mind and someone up to no good."

So next time, think twice before asking someone what time it is or you'll be dragged off the bus in a white suit.


3. Holding a door open for a woman

"At some point in recent history this noble gesture of courtesy got redefined a shocking act of chauvinism."

It has? Did I miss out COmedy Stop making fun of this? Is that why I repeatedly get kicked in the shins for holding the door open for my girlfriend?

"It's not clear when precisely this happened. Perhaps Mrs Thatcher was to blame."

Yes, you've nailed it on the head. Forget the fact that she broke the unions, destroyed much of the UK's manufacturing base, consigning many to long-term unemployment, it was her policy on holding doors that defined her twelve year reign.


4. Saying that 'Imagine' by John Lennon is rubbish

"There's speaking ill of the dead, then there's speaking ill of a dead Beatle."

Then allow me: this song is s**t.


5. Complimenting a friend/relative on their children

"A real taboo, this."

And insulting John Lennon's 'Imagine' wasn't? Come on MSN, surely you jest.

"On no account must you venture even the mildest of observation about somebody's kids. Society dictates even the vaguest, most throwaway of remarks is tantamount to a confession of something dangerously sordid"

Ah yes, imagine the scene. Two children playing in the park, two different parents sitting on the bench. One child comes over to his mother for something and runs off to play on the swings. The other parent, a father, turns to the mother and comments on what a nice kid she's got. A short phonecall later and he's in the slammer for child grooming.


6. Owning up to drinking full-fat milk

A serious one this. Even buying the stuff is dangerous. I hear you can only get it in specialist shops and they wrap it in a porno mag so you can walk out of the shop looking like a normal person.


7. Asking for a cup of tea in an upmarket cafe

"If you do this, you are treated like a fool."

Waiter: "And what would sir like with his crumpet?"

Customer: "A cup of tea please"

Waiter: "You sir, are a fool."


8. Being irreverent about Princess Diana

This basically singles out everyone who doesn't read the Daily Express.

If you do read the this newspaper, well....you're a prick.


9. Arguing that taxes are good

Have you ever met anyone that has argued in favour of taxes, politicians

aside? The reason they don't mind taxes is because they can claim silly

expenses back off the tax-payers money.

"Hello, my name is Gordon Brown, taboo-breaker, and your new Prime

Minister."


10. Contesting that England has a third-rate football team

This is perhaps only a taboo in England. Everybody else knows England isn't a third-rate football team. It's fourth-rate.

Tequila Scrabble

A few us were out on Friday due to yet another colleague leaving work and to make the most of the good weather, began our assault to the liver by grabbing a table outside of Katy Daly's. There has long been a tradition of dragging a pew for outside mass in the bar and it's a wonder that it and so many other places have only now realised the punter attraction for outside seating on a warm day.

We kicked off with Magner's and ice which melted so quickly that by the end of the pint, I think it was mostly water and the only remedy was another Magner's! The sun was also bearing down and a change of seat was required and luckily someone had lotion so I could apply it to the back of my neck and stave off sunburn.

Not so long after the free food was served and pints were finished, we moved on to the Basement which is not one of my favourite bars. To me, it totally lacks any atmosphere and I'm not sure but they might still serve chips in tiny buckets which only serves to drive the nail into the coffin. Still, the Guinness was nice.

From there we went to AM:PM for some food to quell the stomach and settled on tapas. I'm surprised this place is still open as the last time we were here at 10pm on a Saturday night it was deader than A-line flares with pockets in the knees. The tapas itself wasn't up to much and the best place in Belfast is still The Spaniard.

Our next and last port of call was the Garrick and after grabbing a table and some pints, we took a crack at some games that were sitting by the bar. Unfortunately most of them were broken or had parts missing so we settled on a game of Scrabble. However, to make things interesting, we had shots of tequila everytime someone used a triple word square.

Three triple word scores/tequila's later, we had enough and I'm pretty sure the words being spelled could not be found in any dictionary. The only words on our lips by midnight were 'Taxi' and 'Home'.

Gamespot #68

Defender 3YK

You've played Defender (what - you haven't?!)

Now play Defender 3YK!

Strategically place assault towers to thwart incoming enemies before they reach your base!